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The Office Apprentice is here!
Mar. 31st, 2004 12:36 pmAnd I'm applying for the show. Whee!
THE OFFICE APPRENTICE
SEASON 2
APPLICATION
NAME:___________________ HOME PHONE: ___________________
ADDRESS: ___________________ WORK PHONE: ___________________
CELL PHONE: ___________________ LIVE JOURNAL OR ONLINE DIARY URL: ____________
E-MAIL: ___________________ INTERVIEW CITY: ___________________
HOMETOWN: ___________________ AGE: ___________________
(The above not filled in for anonymity on LJ)
HOW DID YOU HEAR ABOUT OUR SEARCH? FictionAlley
WHAT IS YOUR IDEAL OCCUPATION? Fandom Mogul
DESCRIBE YOUR LAST TWO JOBS: Well, my current job is to answer the phone and sit in my cubicle ad look like I'm doing something important when really I'm reading porn. But before that I had an out-of-the-way office, so I could shut the door and either sleep, post on FA, or read porn.
HOW WOULD FRIENDS OR CO-WORKERS DESCRIBE YOU? She'd be scary if she weren't so incompetent.
IF YOU COULD BE A MEME, WHAT MEME WOULD YOU BE? Is that sort of like being a tree? Um...An oak. Or maybe an oak-aged scotch. I forget which.
DESCRIBE A MAJOR EVENT OR ISSUE THAT HAS AFFECTED YOUR LIFE: Ooh, like when hem lines changed? Dude, that really cheesed me off. Not only did I have to replace like my entire wardrobe, but then the skirts just hit me right in the middle of my calves. Ew!
TELL US AN EMBARRASSING STORY ABOUT YOURSELF, AND NOTE WHETHER IT HAS BEEN FEATURED ON FANDOM WANK: Well, okay, so, omigod, I've never told anyone this before, but.... So, y'know how on Fandom Wank there was this thing on there, about two years ago? About some chick who, y'know, thought she was like Cleopatra in a past life? That was me. And of course, there's the whole thing about being left by my boyfriend for my best friend. Twice. Funny stuff.
WHERE DO YOU SEE YOURSELF 5 YEARS FROM NOW? Oh, tough question, lemme see.... Yup, definitely gotta say Playboy bunny.
WHY AND HOW ARE YOU SUCCESSFUL? I owe it all to my sexual freedom and my lack of inhibition.
WHICH JUNIOR APPRENTICE DO YOU MOST WANT TO MEET, AND WHY? Like, omigod, definitely Sean Biggerstaff. I mean, who wouldn't?
OR WOULD YOU RATHER SPEND TIME WITH THE DONALD OR RICKY? Wow. You mean I'd get to MEET DONALD? Oh, wow. Yeah, definitely him. 'Cause his hair's so sexy.
WHAT SORT OF KERFUFFLES WOULD YOU GENERATE AS AN OFFICE APPRENTICE, AND WHAT TYPES OF WANGST WOULD BE GENERATED THEREFROM?I would try to create a site where everyone could say whatever they wanted about anything fandom-related, and a lot of things that aren't, provided they didn't flame each other, and as long as fics were R-rated or lower and reasonably grammatically correct, they'd be accepted regardless of Ship, plot, or the presence of Mary-Sues. The kerfuffles, of course, would come because people would just think that we're Orwellian, megalomaniacal, and of course completely amoral. Oh, wait.... Can I start again? Ahem. I would of course cause havoc throughout the fandom by sleeping with just about anyone who approached me, even the gay guys, and then pitting them against each other in a massive wizards' duel for my honour.
ARE YOU COMFORTABLE WITH HOUSE ELVES SERVING YOU? WHY OR WHY NOT? Well, first I'd have to know: Are they Union?
What do you think? Do you think I have a real shot at it? Oh, I hope so.
Check it out here!
THE OFFICE APPRENTICE
SEASON 2
APPLICATION
NAME:___________________ HOME PHONE: ___________________
ADDRESS: ___________________ WORK PHONE: ___________________
CELL PHONE: ___________________ LIVE JOURNAL OR ONLINE DIARY URL: ____________
E-MAIL: ___________________ INTERVIEW CITY: ___________________
HOMETOWN: ___________________ AGE: ___________________
(The above not filled in for anonymity on LJ)
HOW DID YOU HEAR ABOUT OUR SEARCH? FictionAlley
WHAT IS YOUR IDEAL OCCUPATION? Fandom Mogul
DESCRIBE YOUR LAST TWO JOBS: Well, my current job is to answer the phone and sit in my cubicle ad look like I'm doing something important when really I'm reading porn. But before that I had an out-of-the-way office, so I could shut the door and either sleep, post on FA, or read porn.
HOW WOULD FRIENDS OR CO-WORKERS DESCRIBE YOU? She'd be scary if she weren't so incompetent.
IF YOU COULD BE A MEME, WHAT MEME WOULD YOU BE? Is that sort of like being a tree? Um...An oak. Or maybe an oak-aged scotch. I forget which.
DESCRIBE A MAJOR EVENT OR ISSUE THAT HAS AFFECTED YOUR LIFE: Ooh, like when hem lines changed? Dude, that really cheesed me off. Not only did I have to replace like my entire wardrobe, but then the skirts just hit me right in the middle of my calves. Ew!
TELL US AN EMBARRASSING STORY ABOUT YOURSELF, AND NOTE WHETHER IT HAS BEEN FEATURED ON FANDOM WANK: Well, okay, so, omigod, I've never told anyone this before, but.... So, y'know how on Fandom Wank there was this thing on there, about two years ago? About some chick who, y'know, thought she was like Cleopatra in a past life? That was me. And of course, there's the whole thing about being left by my boyfriend for my best friend. Twice. Funny stuff.
WHERE DO YOU SEE YOURSELF 5 YEARS FROM NOW? Oh, tough question, lemme see.... Yup, definitely gotta say Playboy bunny.
WHY AND HOW ARE YOU SUCCESSFUL? I owe it all to my sexual freedom and my lack of inhibition.
WHICH JUNIOR APPRENTICE DO YOU MOST WANT TO MEET, AND WHY? Like, omigod, definitely Sean Biggerstaff. I mean, who wouldn't?
OR WOULD YOU RATHER SPEND TIME WITH THE DONALD OR RICKY? Wow. You mean I'd get to MEET DONALD? Oh, wow. Yeah, definitely him. 'Cause his hair's so sexy.
WHAT SORT OF KERFUFFLES WOULD YOU GENERATE AS AN OFFICE APPRENTICE, AND WHAT TYPES OF WANGST WOULD BE GENERATED THEREFROM?
ARE YOU COMFORTABLE WITH HOUSE ELVES SERVING YOU? WHY OR WHY NOT? Well, first I'd have to know: Are they Union?
What do you think? Do you think I have a real shot at it? Oh, I hope so.
Check it out here!
