Huh. I'm totally alone, then.

I completely get why it's easy to think he's covering up (poorly) the fact that he's had this fantasy many times.

But I actually think the reason he's having it in front of Sam is that he got himself all worked up about what Sam might see because he's there. Like trying not to think of a white elephant.

I do agree that he has to have had some fantasies about a settled, normal life. But I don't necessarily think that the idyllic picture, particularly with Lisa and Ben in the wings, is something that he's conscious he's dreamed before. I think it's more a case that because he was worried he might have some embarrassing, girly romantic fantasy...Boom, coming right up.

I mean, he'd clearly also never had the "dream" in which he talks to his demon self. He'd never had the opportunity to face his contradictory feelings about his father.

So while I think that "Oh, he's totally lying" is an easy way to read it, I also think it's a valid choice to say that he really *hasn't* dreamed that dream - recurring, consciously, lucidly - and that it's partly there as a consequence of his own insecurity at being accompanied by Sam.

But I'm obviously the only one who thinks so.