Eeek

[gwendolyngrace]

I'm in full agreement with Flanders and Swann:

The thing I really dread
When I've just got out of bed
Is to find that there's a spider in [my path]



What I hate most about spiders is that they're sneaky bastards. They conceal themselves in the most innocuous places, like, say... in a cooler, and there you are, going about your business. You flip up the flap of the cooler and - BAM. There's the spider. Lying in wait.

Shudder, shudder, shudder.

The cooler is currently enjoying the fresh air while I wait for the spider to leave. I tried to shake it out and dropped the cooler, so... it can stay there for a bit.

guhuhuhuh.

Comments

[ali888.livejournal.com]

"The thing I really dread
When I've just got out of bed
Is to find that there's a spider in [my path]"

Which song is that from?

[gwendolyngrace.livejournal.com]

It's "The Spider" from The Bestiary of Flanders and Swann:

I have fought a grizzly bear
Tracked a cobra to its lair
Killed a crocodile who dared to cross my path,
But the thing I really dread
When I've just got out of bed
Is to find that there's a spider in the bath.

I've no fear of wasps or bees,
Mosquitoes only tease,
I rather like a cricket on the hearth,
But my blood runs cold to meet,
In pyjamas and bare feet,
With a great big hairy spider in the bath.

I have faced a charging bull in Barcelona,
I have dragged a mountain lioness from her cub.
I have brought a mad gorilla to its owner,
But I don't dare face that tub.

What a frightful looking beast,
Half an inch across, at least!
It would frighten even Superman or Garth.
There's contempt it can't disguise
In the little beady eyes
Of the spider, sitting, glowering in the bath.

It ignores my every lunge
With the back-brush and the sponge,
I have bombed it with 'A Present from Penarth'
It just rolls into a ball,
Doesn't seem to mind at all,
And simply goes on squatting in the bath.

For hours we have been locked in endless struggle,
I have lured it to the deep end by the drain,
At last, I think I've washed it down the plughole,
But here it comes a-crawling up the chain!

Now it's time for me to shave,
Though my nerves will not behave,
And there's bound to be a fearful aftermath,
So before I cut my throat,
Let me leave this final note:
'Driven to it by the spider in the bath!'